I hope you never listened to Rex on the radio commentating a game then as you (and everyone else) would not have a clue who the players were ?
I can't see much point in using nicknames and then the person's name as well , but just for you I have made up a team
Seagull , Apple , Apricot , Heater , ?
= Lloyd , Crisp , Maynard , Shaw , Hartlett
Jelly , Titch , Bont , Pendles , Telly , Danger , Scottish Suitcase , Don't Pay
= J Kelly , Mitchell , Bontempelli , Pendlebury , T Kelly , Dangerfield , McCluggage , Perryman
Nic Nat , Jacobs
= Naitanui , Jacobs
Buddy , Dusty , Poster Boy , TJL , Tex , JDG
= Buddy , D Martin , Heeney , Tom Lynch (Richmond) , Walker , de Goey
In all seriousness though , good to read that life is on the improve for you , looked scary enough on TV , real life I would imagine would be 1000 times worse
Good luck